Cougar Jokes

What do you call a Japanese Cougar with exceptional taste?

Umami

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How does a cougar obtain the perfect tan?

She uses a perfect son.

What do you call a cat that claims it's a lion crossed with a cougar?

A liar.

What did the Pope say when a cougar crossed his path?

Oh my gosh I almost Puma pants.

What do John Mellencamp and Ashton Kutcher have in common?

They both picked up a Cougar and then thought better of it.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

How do you think we can better handle this in the future?

ME glaring at Cheryl, who took the last donut: idk, maybe don't hire Cheryl

What is the difference between God and a police officer?

God doesn't think he's a police officer.

Liar Jokes More Liar Jokes

What do you call a cat that claims it's a lion crossed with a cougar?

A liar.

Why are liars so lazy?

Because they are always lying in bed!

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a dove and a serpent?

A Christian...

What do you get if you cross a bunch of flowers with a burglar ?

Robbery with violets !

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What's your spirit animal?

An eagle. They're so majestic." MEANWHILE Horse: hey eagle, what's your spirit human Eagle: this guy Dave

What did the IT guy say when he threw RAM sticks at the stripper?

RAMs a make a dance!"

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do cats and people that submit jokes with the punchline "PLAGIARISM" have in common?

THEY BOTH LICK THEIR PAWS!

What does a cat say when its trapped in a box?

Let MEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWWWt

Vacation Jokes More Vacation Jokes

What do you use to gamble on vacation?

Pair-a-dice!

Where do pots go on vacation?

JaPAN! From my 9 year old.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures?

Because nurses are taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.

Why is it more expensive to use air pumps nowadays?

Inflation

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

What is your funniest joke about the French?

Mine is this: How do you pick out the Frenchmen in a room full of naked soldiers? They're the ones with sunburned armpits.

Why do sailors use liquid soap?

It takes longer to pick up when they drop it.