What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who's trying to get home?

A taxi

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

Why couldn't Susie ride the swings?

A: Because she has no arms! Knock knock. Who's there Not Susie!

Why was the guy from 127 Hours arrested for espionage?

He was proven guilty of providing arms to Iraq

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a spider with no legs?

A raisin

What do you call a dog without front legs?

Chester.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why do girls make a "shhhhh" noise while peeing and men don't?

Cos men have a 6 inch silencer.

How many men does it take to open a can of beer?

None. She should have opened it as she brought it to you.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why is my waiting room empty?

Judge: "I hauled everyone off to court" Doctor: "You're trying my patients"

What did the Italian chef say when his boss tried to pick a fight?

You wanna pizza me !

Taxi Jokes More Taxi Jokes

When are you going to learn to drive?

I don't think they feel very safe in my taxi.

How do you get to Carnegie Hall?

take a taxi