What do you call a pirate who is lost at sea and has to drink his own pee to survive?

Aarrrrrrr Kelly!

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Sea Jokes More Sea Jokes

Why does it take so long for pirates to learn the alphabet?

Because they can spend years at sea.

Why do seagulls live by the Sea..?

Because if they lived by the Bay, they would be bagels! Honestly this cracked me up when I first heard it.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

How to lose a gf: Gf: which of my friends would be the most fun to have a 3some with?

Me: *names two of them*

Why did Jared lose so much weight?

He always went for the 6 instead of the 12

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What did the Israelite say to the american when offering him a drink?

Here, try this, Israeli refreshing!"

What do you call a self help book for a Country Music singer?

Drink, Pray, Truck

Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

Which anti-virus software do pirates prefer?

Avast, ye scurvy dogs!

Why is being a pirate addictive?

They say that after you lose your first hand, you get hooked!

Survive Jokes More Survive Jokes

What is the difference between British and American schoolchildren?

British schoolchildren survive hide-and-seek.

What kind of bug can survive all winter?

A bahumbug!

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

Why do women have trouble peeing in the morning?

You ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich

What can 5 men do that 5 women can't do?

Pee in a cup.