What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and your TV is floating?

Man, wall mounts are awesome."

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Float Jokes More Float Jokes

What's blue and yellow and sits at the bottom of the pool?

A baby with slashed floaties. What's red and yellow and floats on top of the pool? Floaties with a slashed baby.

What did they find floating in the toilet of the S.S Enterprise?

Captains Log

Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

What do Kermit the Frog and Henry the VIII have in common?

Same middle name.

What do John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

They have the same middle name!

Tv Jokes More Tv Jokes

What's on TV?

I said, 'Dust.' And that's how the fight started....

Where do tv's go on vacation?

To remote Islands

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What's the first thing a Navy wife does when she wakes up in the morning?

She puts her clothes back on and goes home.

What do you call that mean guy who keeps waking you up?

A myoclonic jerk.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What did one flea say to the other after a night out ?

Shall we walk home or take a dog

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do with most of his time?

Stay up all night wondering if there is a Dog.