What's the big deal about jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

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Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What did Matthew McConaughey yell at the drive that was about to miss his turn?

A right a right a right!

What was the most pivotal point in Jesus' ministry?

When he turned the tables on the Temple vendors!

Water Jokes More Water Jokes

How do you convince your neighbor to share their water with you?

Try to get a long well.

What do you call it when you have enough money to but a truck from 4 different people who used to cross small bodies of water?

You can afford four fjord forders' fords.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What strengths do you bring to the job?

long pause while Jesus glares at interviewer* Are you being serious right now

What are your plans for Easter?

Husband: Same as Jesus.. Wife: What do you mean Husband:I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday!!

Wine Jokes More Wine Jokes

Why doesn't The Rock just tell us what he's cooking?

I can't pair wines like this.

What's the difference between little girls and wine?

Wine gets better as it gets older

Vodka Jokes More Vodka Jokes

What do you call an Arnold Palmer with vodka?

A John Daly

What's a Jedi's favorite brand of vodka?

Skyy. Only Sith deal in Absolut.

Student Loan Jokes More Student Loan Jokes

Why did the college student ask for a refund on his student loan?

Because his *degree* didn't work!

What's the big deal about jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

Big Deal Jokes More Big Deal Jokes

What's the big deal?

It's not like I did it on porpoise!

Why are we making such a big deal about the wheels on the bus going round and round?

They're wheels.