Vodka Jokes

How do Russian sprinters train?

They put a bottle of vodka 100 meters away from them.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

How do you get 30 drunk Russians out of the pool?

Put 30 crates of vodka near the pool

Why didn't JFK ever like vodka?

Because he couldn't handle a few shots

What's the Russian word for water?

Vodka

What would happen if Russia ran out of vodka?

Well, my dear reddit, in nature there is law of conservation of matter. Therefore, if the vodka disappeared somewhere, it would appear somewhere else. And then there would be Russia.

What brand of vodka does a Canadian drink?

Grey Moose

What is the difference between homeless and vodka?

Vodka does not freeze

What do you call an Arnold Palmer with vodka?

A John Daly

What did the bartender day to the man who was drinking his vodka to fast?

Stop "Russian"

What's the big deal about jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

What's a Jedi's favorite brand of vodka?

Skyy. Only Sith deal in Absolut.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why don't the jedi drink vodka?

Because only the Sith deal in absolut

You might also enjoy:

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

How was school?

4: Trenton said his dad likes to go outside and fight lions - laughs - oh honey - nobody would name their kid Trenton

Why are Eskimos always alone?

Because they like being ice-olated

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

Why do Russian police officers always work in groups of three?

One of them can read, and one of them can write. The third one is there to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

How do the Russian people feel about their government?

They're Putin up with it.

100 Meter Jokes More 100 Meter Jokes

What's Isis' favorite race?

The 100-meter daesh. Q: What's Isis' favorite punctuation mark? A: The em-daesh. Q: How much cinnamon does the Isis recipe for gingersnaps call for? A: Just a daesh.

What's the worst thing about running 100 meters in less than 10 seconds?

Being black.

Law Jokes More Law Jokes

What would happen if Russia ran out of vodka?

Well, my dear reddit, in nature there is law of conservation of matter. Therefore, if the vodka disappeared somewhere, it would appear somewhere else. And then there would be Russia.