Why did Jesus take three days to resurrect after dying on the cross?

Because the date wasn't nailed down.

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Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Why are black people getting stronger?

Because the televisions these days are getting heavier.

Why are there school shootings?

Mr.Garrison: "Let's start the day with a world news question. Why are there school shootings?" The media: "Violent video games?" Mr.Garrison: "Okay, now lets try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did the depressed chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side :(

What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time ?

Cross mouse cards !

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How'd you die?

I got shot trying to save my fellow soldiers lives in war. You " "I got trampled trying to save on a flat screen" "Oh.."

What's so cool about cemeteries?

I don't get it. People are dying to get in them.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why did Jesus go to a Candy shop?

To Test a Mint

Why doesn't Jesus buy beer?

Hebrews.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

What did the people who hung Jesus to the cross say?

Nailed it

What is the difference between Jesus and a painting?

You only need a nail to hang a painting.

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

Why did the strawberry go out with the pineapple?

Because he couldn't get a date!

What does Reddit and Dating have in common?

It wastes your time and you walk away with either tears or a slight chuckle.

Resurrect Jokes More Resurrect Jokes

Why did jesus take 3 days to resurrect?

He got hammered with his buddies.

What did Asian Jesus say before he was crucified?

OC) YORO (You only resurrect once)