Why did you cancel your gym membership?

Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with

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Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many surrealist painters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Fish. I got this from bash.org a long time ago, but I can't find the original post, so have this

How many cafeteria staff does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry we closed 18 seconds ago and I've just cashed up."

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

What do you call an aborted Czechoslovakian?

A cancelled Chzeck.

What's being in love feel like?

You know when someone cancels plans you wanted to cancel anyway Almost as good as that.

Vend Machine Jokes More Vend Machine Jokes

What do Monica Lewinsky and a vending machine have in common?

Both say Please insert Bill.

What does a vending machine and Monica Lewinsky have in common?

They both say "Insert Bill Here"

Vend Jokes More Vend Jokes

What's black and steals your change?

Vending machines.

Why did you cancel your gym membership?

Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with

Agree Jokes More Agree Jokes

What's the biggest lie of the Universe?

I Have Read and Agree to the Terms of Service."

What can both Christians and Atheists agree on about Jesus?

Kanye's not him.

Gym Membership Jokes More Gym Membership Jokes

Why are gym memberships illegal?

Because of the Free Exercise Clause.

Why did you cancel your gym membership?

Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with