Why didn't the dog play cards on his ocean cruise?

Because the captain stood on the deck.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you call a dog with no hind legs?

Dragon balls!

Why do dogs bury bones in the ground ?

Because you can't bury them in trees !

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

How do black people die from a drive by?

Everytime someone screams "get down! " they stand up and start dancing!

Why did the woman leave her overweight husband unconscious in a burning building?

Because she couldn't stand him.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What do you call Kurt Russel playing an archaeologist?

Kurt Fossil

Why did Ayn Rand lose the pool tournament?

She wouldn't play on a regulation size table

Deck Jokes More Deck Jokes

Why couldn't the animals on Noah's Ark play cards?

A: Because Noah was standing on the deck!

What does marriage have in common with a deck of cards?

In the beginning, you only need two hearts and a diamond. Later on, a club and a spade.

Card Jokes More Card Jokes

Why didn't the dog play cards on his ocean cruise?

Because the captain stood on the deck.

What kind of cards do donkeys send out near Christmas?

A: Mule-tide greetings.

Captain Jokes More Captain Jokes

What does the captain of the USS Enterprise do for exercise?

Jean-Luc Picardio

Why was the Bhut Jolokia picked to be the captain of the cheer squad?

Because it was the hottest pepper.