Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Because their sheep can hear zippers.

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What kind of beast is it you hear?

A duck. ... with hiccups.

Why did the duck go to the basketball game?

He heard the ref was blowing fouls!

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why do women wear makeup and perfume?

Because they are ugly and they stink.

Why don't women wear skirts during winter?

They'll get chapped lips!

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

What does a sheep say after walking into a disgusting, dirty bar?

Ew.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a holiday resort ?

The Baaahaaamaaas !

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Because their sheep can hear zippers.

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

What has over a hundred teeth and keeps back Godzilla?

my zipper!

Why do Scotsman wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

Scottish Man Jokes More Scottish Man Jokes

How can you tell what clan a Scottish man is from?

Look under his kilt and if he has a quarter pounder then he is a McDonald.

What do you call a Scottish man with no arms and no legs?

a bell.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

What did the Scottish man do when he ran out of pants to wear?

He kilt himself

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away