Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.

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What do you call a geologist who can't hear?

Stone deaf...

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A bow T.I.E.

Why don't tortoises wear scarves?

They have turtlenecks

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Why is the LSU football team like my car?

They both used to have Les (less) Miles!

Why do Redditors get excited when a tornado rips down miles of fences?

Because there is a lot of reposting to do.

Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

Why does the Navy put Marines on board ships?

A. "Because sheep would be too obvious"

What do you call a New Zealander with a sheep under each arm?

A pimp.

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What is the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer?

One says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!". The other says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!".

What did the Scottish epileptic boy get for Christmas?

A Wii fit

Zipper Jokes More Zipper Jokes

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away

Why do Scots wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

Why do Scottish men wear kilts instead of jeans?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!

Scottish People Jokes More Scottish People Jokes

What do the Scottish people call iPhone?

A: an AYE-Phone. (Joke brought to you by a 5 year old)

Why Do Scottish people wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper go down a mile away.