Beef Stew Jokes

What's better than Norwegian Beef Stew?

No Beef Stew at all

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How do you make beef stew?

Tell a cow they're being watched.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you know if a complete stranger is vegan?

They already told you.

What do you tell a woman with a black eye?

Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Raise Jokes More Raise Jokes

How to raise a kid?

I injected my kid with yeast and put him in the oven for 30 minutes but he didn't rise. Any suggestions

Why was the horse farmer arrested?

He was raising a colt.

Norwegian Jokes More Norwegian Jokes

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't bother, you can find lutfisk in the dark.

Why do Norwegians drive Chevys?

They're afraid of drowning in a Fjord.

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

How many Syrians does it take to launch a missle?

Two. One to launch it, and one to watch CNN to find out where it landed.

What happened when the two lovers were watching a scary movie in a year when Valentine's day happened to fall on Friday the 13th?

Oh wait, nevermind. I'm an idiot...*

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What kind of bathroom does Napoleon use?

A Waterloo

What would Steve Urkel say if he used The Force?

Jedi do that?

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why are black people afraid of high fives?

They don't want to be left hanging

Why did the skull not want to go to prom, but still did?

He didn't have any *body* to go with But he still really wanted to bone.

Beef Jokes More Beef Jokes

Why did the vegan avoid the confrontation?

He didn't want any beef.

What did the human torch say before he cooked the beef?

FILET MIGNON!**

Brandy Jokes More Brandy Jokes

Why did the farmer put brandy in the cow's food?

He wanted to raised stewed beef!

What would happen if you crossed Magilla Gorilla with a Saint Bernard?

It would drink the brandy it would carry and act like a big Gorilla!