Illegal Immigrant Jokes

What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants?

E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home.

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Why was the illegal immigrant so offensive?

Because he crossed the line

What do you call a fight between a child molester and an illegal immigrant?

Alien versus Predator.

What Do You Call A Fight Between An Illegal Immigrant And A Child Molester?

Alien vs. Predator

What's the difference between a feminist and an illegal immigrant?

The illegal immigrant knows how to cook.

Where do most illegal immigrants go in America?

Allah-bama.

Why... Can't illegal US immigrants play Uno?

Because they keep stealing all the Green Cards

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Cook Jokes More Cook Jokes

Why did the cannibal stab the chef with a toothpick?

To see if he was done cooking.

How do the Muslims like their eggs cooked?

Sunni side up. I know this is a Shiite joke.

English Jokes More English Jokes

Where did the English teacher and the student fight?

in the MLA boxing ring

What dog is always tired in London?

An English sleep dog.

Alien Jokes More Alien Jokes

What did the aliens say, when they came to earth in search of soda pop?

Take me to your liter!

What do you call an alien from Austria?

Austalian

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a new wife and a new dog?

After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

What's the difference between a scaffold and a magnet?

A magnet only has two Poles.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the best part about living in Switzerland?

I don't know, but the flag is a big plus

What is the most socially unacceptable joke you know?

Preferably really dark or 'just plain wrong' jokes.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a sheltie and a cantaloupe?

A melon collie.

What do you get when you cross a Native American with phosphorylation?

ATP

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

Why didn't the President fight with the chair?

Because we don't negotiate with chair-orrists.

What do you mean I've had enough to drink?

Hold my beer while I fight this lamppost.

Uno Jokes More Uno Jokes

Why don't people like to play uno with Mexicans?

Because they always steal the green cards....

Why should you never play Uno with a foreigner?

Because they will always steal the green cards.