Volume Jokes

What is the volume of a disk with radius z and height a?

Pi * z * z * a

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Why couldn't Obi-Wan calculate the volume of Bespin from the ideal gas law?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes

What is the volume of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?

One US Leader

What is the volume of pizza?

Pizza of course! If z = radius of the pizza and a = the height then * radius2 * height = Pi * z * z * a = Pizza.

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

What is the volume of a pizza of thickness A and radius Z?

PI Z Z A

How Am I Doing?

I'll Tell You How I'm Doing Volumes: 1-8

I saw a nice stereo on Craigslist for $1. Seller says the volume is stuck on ‘high’

I couldn’t turn it down.

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Sheet Music Jokes More Sheet Music Jokes

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

How do you get a guitar player to shut up?

Put sheet music in front of him

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why are hemorrhoid and diarrhea so hard to spell?

Like if you're talking about them, you aren't having a rough enough time already.

What's worse than a talking parrot joke?

The Holocaust.

Sith Deal Jokes More Sith Deal Jokes

Why don't Jedi Knights use the Kelvin scale?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

Why couldn't Obi-Wan calculate the volume of Bespin from the ideal gas law?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes

Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

What sound does an Italian make when you shoot him?

Wop

Why do Italians wear gold chains?

So they know where to stop shaving.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell who is the head nurse of a facility?

She's the one with dirty knees.

How do you know who in the room is a vegetarian?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

Absolute Jokes More Absolute Jokes

Why don't Jedi Knights use the Kelvin scale?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

What do short people call something that's too high up?

Absolute zero, because it's impossible to reach

Leader Jokes More Leader Jokes

What do you call an IS-leader on a motorcycle?

Abu Bikr

What is the volume of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?

One US Leader

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What do you call that mean guy who keeps waking you up?

A myoclonic jerk.

Why are you always tired, Dad?

my 3-year-old asked as she woke me from a nap by poking me in the eye.