How can you tell a vampire has a cold?

They start coffin.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What sort of a car has your dad got?

I can't remember the name. I think it starts with T. Really - Ours only starts with gas.

How do you get two whales in a car?

Start in England and drive West.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did GabeN tell his wife when she shouted "shut your hole" at him?

Babe, it's a valve!"

How do you tell the difference?

I told him "It's easy! Julie has long blonde hair..." "..and Derek has a moustache"

Cold Jokes More Cold Jokes

What goes hum-choo hum choo?

A bee with a cold !

What did the sick fish say when he got sick?

I've cod a cold."

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What's the thing u don't tell a vampire?

Bite me.

What do you say to a vampire when he graduates from college?

Coagulations!

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What is brown all around and looks good on a motorcyclist?

A coffin.

Why did the man with bronchitis get cremated..?

he was tired of coffin.