God bless America.
Virgins.
The washer doesn't follow you around after you put a load in it.
America: Getting rid of u
An immigrant.**
When God forgets to pay the electricity bill.
It's a match made in Heaven!
Dustin Johnson sneezed.
Because pepper makes them sneeze!
A gargoyle!
Hey, S-tat-ue?
Are you my mother
Because she's really French, and the French have no GUTS!
Pupil: Because it can't sit down!
Go bless yourself.
Because whenever one started up, the big blades would go "wop...wop... wop" and the little blades would go "guineaguineaguinea".
