When I lose faith in humanity, I think of Chili's just handing out sick, light-up beepers, trusting us to return them. And know what?

We do.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why does the North Korean military always lose their battles?

xpost /r/meanjokes Every single shot at them is at a chink in their armor.

What did the snail say when his friend lost his car?

Where did Es-car-go.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you think is the biggest problem in Germany?

Uncertainty or indifference ' He answered: I don't know and I don't care!'

What is the distinction between a man that has had a vasectomy and one who hasn't?

I don't know, as far as I'm concerned there's not a vas deferens.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What are you doing today?

2: 'Well, I think I can really push my limits' 1: 'Oh right, are you sure ' 2: 'I'm definite'.

Where do cows stay when they go on vacation?

In a moooo-tel. I just thought of this sitting in my hotel room. Sometimes I feel like i dad joke so hard I impregnate my girlfriend from 100 miles away.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What did both the bomb expert and the digital clock maker say to their mother?

Look, Ma! No hands!

What's this?

Me: A napkin holder K: What's a napkin M: You wipe your hands on it when they're dirty K: You mean like the couch M: ...

Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why can you always trust Frankenstein's monster?

He's got somebody else's back, he could probably handle yours.

Why wouldn't the pimp water his lawn?

He couldn't trust his hose.

Return Jokes More Return Jokes

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't return?

Stick

Why didn't Russia return the NSA whistleblower to the United States?

He was Snowden.

Humanity Jokes More Humanity Jokes

What can stop supervirus from destroying humanity ?

Batvirus ( stolen joke xD )

What do you call the border between humanity and animals?

The Mediterranean Sea

Faith Jokes More Faith Jokes

What is Darth Vader's least favorite band?

Faith No More

What did Darth Vader say to Admiral Motti after browsing his collection of George Michael records?

I find your lack of Faith disturbing."

Chili Jokes More Chili Jokes

What do you ask a Mexican girl you like?

Netflix and chili

Why do the Irish serve up their chili with 139 beans?

Because one more would be one-farty bowl of chili!