Who are all these people Twitter wants me to follow?

Has the fail whale been stalking me. Help, stranger danger!

Previous Random Joke Next

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What makes me want to lose the will to live?

r/Jokes!

What's the last thing you want to hear when blowing Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson"

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why should you never ask people with Down Syndrome to use a printer?

They always make an extra copy

Why do people want attention of 1000 pies?

because it's their sen-pais

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

How many retweets to let me take your sister to prom?

A student walks up to his friend a week before prom and asks, "Hey, how many Twitter retweets do i have to get to take your sister to prom?" His friend says, "Dude, she was abducted! She's been missing 3 weeks, you know this!" The student says, "So you're saying if i find her, i can take her?"

What did I do before Twitter?

Well, there's my family and......OH MY GOD WHERE'S MY FAMILY ! !

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

Who are all these people Twitter wants me to follow?

Has the fail whale been stalking me. Help, stranger danger!

What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?

You can throw your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you around for two weeks afterward

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What did one hand say to the other?

Help, I think I'm in glove".

How do you turn a computer into a zombie?

Send it a byte. Kind of lame but I couldn't help myself.

Stalk Jokes More Stalk Jokes

Why should you avoid people dressed as celery?

They could be stalking you!

What do you call 1 black guy being stalked by 200 white guys?

PGA Tour.