Why buy expensive fireworks when you can make your own with ordinary household chemicals?

I said, and the other patients in the ER agreed.

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Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Where do Year 1 Guardians buy their clothes?

Twilight Gap

Where does Dracula buy his pencils?

Pennsylvania.

Patient Jokes More Patient Jokes

How much longer do I have doc?

Doctor: "Ten." Patient: "Ten what " Doctor: "Nine..."

Why didn't the patient sue the dentist for pulling the wrong tooth?

Because it was accidental.

Agree Jokes More Agree Jokes

What did the man say when the calculator agreed to help him load the car?

I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU

What did the nudist criminal say when he agreed to a criminal plan?

I'm in, but I'm not decent."

Er Jokes More Er Jokes

How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb?

Only one, but... It takes the entire ER department to get it back out.

How many perverts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one. But it takes the whole ER to get it out.