Why did the doctor kick his patients?

He was trying to heel them.

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why do carcinogens want to give us cancer so badly?

Because they're trying asbestos they can.

What did the physicist say to the two women he was trying to pick up at the bar?

Do you ladies wanna go back to my place and conduct a double slit experiment?"

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Who's the laziest doctor at the hospital?

Doctor Dolittle

What did the doctor say to the speeding commuter?

Thank you for your patients.

Kick Jokes More Kick Jokes

Why was Harry Potter kicked out of Hogwarts?

Why was Harry Potter kicked out of Hogwarts? He was caught playing with his broomstick.

What's the best way to kick a habit today (day after Thanksgiving)?

Cold turkey.

Patient Jokes More Patient Jokes

Why is a doctor always calm?

He got a lot of patients

What did the lazy surgeon say to his patient?

Suture self!

Heel Jokes More Heel Jokes

Why did the doctor kick his patients?

He was trying to heel them.

Why doesn't Achilles have any scars?

His wounds always heel.