Why do you Americans drive on the wrong side of the road?

I told him, "Dude, we literally drive on the right side."

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American Jokes More American Jokes

How do you get 30 drunk Americans out of the pool?

Allahu Akhbarrrr"

Why do american bears have forelimbs?

They have the right to bear arms

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What's the difference between a carpenter and a construction worker?

30 IQ points. This, as any carpenter will tell you, isn't a joke.

Why do so many Australian men experience premature ejeculation?

Because they cant wait to get out and tell all their friends about scoring.

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road with a knife?

Because it saw Lena Dunham on the other side.

How many chicken does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Still counting. Those darned birds can't seem to cross the road to get over here to screw in the light bulb.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What does an apple and an apple tree have in common?

A: They both don't drive tractors.

Why did Jesus have to walk everywhere?

He drove a Ford.

Right Jokes More Right Jokes

What does it mean when a pedestrian has the right of way?

When you see a pedestrian, youve got to get them, right away

Why do women always sleep on the left side of the bed?

BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO RIGHTS!!!!!

Wrong Jokes More Wrong Jokes

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

Whats the best thing on the menu?

Waiter: The cheesebur- Me: WRONG! *points to the picture I drew on it of Ironman fighting Darth Vader*

Dude Jokes More Dude Jokes

Why didn't the lifeguard save the drowning hippy?

Because he was too far out... (dude).

How many retweets to let me take your sister to prom?

A student walks up to his friend a week before prom and asks, "Hey, how many Twitter retweets do i have to get to take your sister to prom?" His friend says, "Dude, she was abducted! She's been missing 3 weeks, you know this!" The student says, "So you're saying if i find her, i can take her?"