Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more?

He kept trying to shave the princess.

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Why is Elsa not allowed a balloon?

Because she'll let it goooo

What do Ryan Giggs and Imogen Thomas have in common?

I'm not allowed to tell you

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What did Michael J. Fox's dad say when Michael J. Fox tried to parallel park?

Watch the Parking son."

How'd you die?

I got shot trying to save my fellow soldiers lives in war. You " "I got trampled trying to save on a flat screen" "Oh.."

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What do you get if you play a C&amp?

W song backwards? Your wife back, your house back, your car back, and your dog back.

Whats the similarity between Monkey in the Middle and Football?

Both of the groups that are concered about the health of someone playing both begin with the letter P.

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What do you call shaving a crazy sheep?

Shear madness.

Why'd you shave it off?

Me: I just told you...

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Where does Sean Connery put his beard clippings?

His shavings account.

How does Sean Connery shave?

Ctrl+esh

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How do you upset a plumber?

Kidnap his princess.

What do you call a man whose wife was the Queen, his daughter a Princess and his boss an Emperor, but he himself is no royal?

Darth Vader.

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Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more?

He kept trying to shave the princess.

What kind of pants do the Super Mario Bros. wear?

Denim denim denim..... I'll see myself out.