Bruise Jokes

What do you call an injured martial artist?

Bruised Lee

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Why did the banana bruise?

Answer: Because it was given a good fruit punch! zing

What is the worst part about being black?

You never know if your gums are bruised.

Why does Mario hate Punchbug?

Because he bruises like-a Peach!

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the difference between Putin and Poutine?

Umm... I don't know ... I've got nothing.

What are Asian Tennis Players most well known for?

The Back Hand

Gum Jokes More Gum Jokes

How do you get gum out of hair?

cancer -I'm sorry-

How do you get rid of chewing gum in your hair?

Cancer :)

7 Jokes More 7 Jokes

Why did Microsoft skip windows 9?

Because 7 ate 9

Why can't I have coffee?

Me: It'll make u even more energetic than u already are 7: But u drink it all the time& u never have energy!

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What's the worst part of being a cook in prison?

Having to toss everyone's salad

What's the worst part about 4 black guys driving off a cliff in an escalade?

They were my friends. :(

Banana Jokes More Banana Jokes

Why did the banana go out with the prune?

Because he couldn't find a date.

What does a kangaroo and a banana have in common?

They both can't ride a bike.

Injure Jokes More Injure Jokes

How do people with injured hands commute to work?

Carpool tunnels

Where would you put an injured insect ?

In an antbulance !

Peach Jokes More Peach Jokes

What did the tomato say to the peach?

Nice pits."

What were Charles Darwin's favorite fruits?

Oranges and peaches.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why do SJWs hate Pong?

It's a wildly successful game that only has straight, white main characters (I stole this joke from somewhere but am not allowed to say where)

Why do most men hate Russian dolls?

Because they're so full of themselves.