Castle Jokes

What's grey and can't swim?

A castle

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Why are all castles disabled?

They all have tur-rets

How long does it take to build a castle?

A Fortnight

Why couldn't Mario ever watch Netflix with Peach?

Because the princess was always on another Castle.

What do I have in common with Franz Kafka?

Neither of us have finished The Castle.

How do whores in Westeros get into the castle?

Hodor.

What's the similarity between designer jeans and cheaply made castles?

No ballroom

What is the rain's favorite medieval reenactment?

Storming a castle.

What do you call a chess blunder where you lose your castle?

A Rook-ey mistake.

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What do girls and parking spaces have in common?

All the good ones are taken and the rest are disabled

What's better than winning a Silver Medal at the Paralympics?

Not being disabled.

Coffee Shop Jokes More Coffee Shop Jokes

What does the rude barista say to the customer in a coffee shop?

I cant decide whether you are a fruitcake or a doughnut!

What do you call a coffee shop where drug deals go down?

The trapp!

Similarity Jokes More Similarity Jokes

What is the similarity between a tornado and a divorce in the south?

Someone is loosing a trailer.

What's the similarity between your wife and a tin roof in a hurricane?

If you didn't nail them properly they'll go see your neighbor

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Why wasn't Daredevil in Civil War?

He doesn't work well with Vision

Why can't Daredevil drive a car?

Because he's from New York.

Build Jokes More Build Jokes

Why was the fish processing factory built beside the computer factory?

So that they could make fish and chips.

What do they do in Alabama when their car breaks down?

Build a house next to it.

Toad Jokes More Toad Jokes

How did the toad feel in the morning?

A little bit froggy

What do you get if cross a science fiction film with a toad ?

Star Warts !

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What do you get when you do laundry and accidentally leave chocolate in your pocket?

Lindt choclate.

Why is it wrong to be on the left?

Because it's not right.

Goose Jokes More Goose Jokes

What happens when you goose a ghost?

You get a hand full of sheet. (Joke from my mom)

How can you tell if your goose is depressed?

It's feeling down.