Heinz Jokes

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?

I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup " So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.

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Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What do you call a fish with three eyes?

fiiish. (works when spoken :-/)

Why did the blind couple get divorced?

They couldn't see eye to eye

2020 Jokes More 2020 Jokes

What do you think you're going to be doing in 5 years?

Me: I dont know, I dont have 2020 vision

Who do you see winning the presidency in 4 years?

I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why did the lady stare at the orange juice?

Because she thought it was telling her to concentrate!

Why was 1 all salty?

Someone told him it was 2's day.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why do people prefer shooting stars to vegetables?

Because they're meteor

How did people charge their phones before electricity?

They didn't...!

Walter White Jokes More Walter White Jokes

What is Walter White's favourite band?

Well it's not Saving Jane, that's for sure.

Why can't you tell Walter White a knock knock joke?

Because HE is the one who knocks.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the author tell his publisher when he handed him a 600 pages instead of the 200 the publisher had asked for?

Sorry, I overwrote your order. :-)

Why shouldn't you ask if someone's a Texan?

Because if they are they'll tell you, and if they aren't you don't want to insult them.

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

What do you call an English teacher five feet tall covered from head to toe in boils and totally bald?

Sir!

Why did the mermaid cover her breasts with seashells?

She outgrew her B shells.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?

Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup.

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.