Ketchup Jokes

Why is ketchup married to mustard?

Cause ketchup accidentally broke the condiment.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What happens when you run away from tomatos?

They ketchup.

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

it's must-up ..

What did the bun say to the hot dog?

I relish the fact that you've mustard the will to ketchup to me!

Why did the mayonnaise win the running race?

Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup.

What did the mother tomato tell the baby tomato when the baby tomato was walking too slow?

Honey, walk faster, KETCHUP!

Why is PC the mustard race?

Because consoles can't ketchup.

What do you call pasta with ketchup?

Spaghetto Ba-dum tss.

What do you tell a slow tomato?

what Ketchup

What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher?

Would you like ketchup with your chips

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What kind of baseball do burgers play?

Ketchup baseball!

Why did the chip chase the sauce?

To ketchup Edit: I'm sorry

Why don't I have a boyfriend?

God: I sent you one, you dumped him for putting ketchup on his steak. Me: Ah. That's right. Gross.

What do you call a drawing of Ketchup?

Sketchup

What does Ramen and Ketchup taste like together?

Poverty.

Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?

I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup " So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.

You might also enjoy:

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call a group of people standing in the arctic circle?

A Finnish line.

What kind of people are always in a damn hurry?

Russians

Walter White Jokes More Walter White Jokes

What do you get when you cast Michael J. Fox as Walter White?

Shaking Bad.

What direction does a Walter White-themed GPS tell you to turn?

Goddamn right.

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What do you call it when your water breaks and you can't get ahold of the midwife?

A midwife crisis.

Why did the personal trainer break up with his girlfriend?

She just wasn't working out.

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

Why must rabbits never miss dinner?

With out their tea they'd be Rabbis.

What did the plate say to the fork?

Don't worry, the dinner's on me.

Condiment Jokes More Condiment Jokes

What do you get when you make a condiment out of an expensive car?

Porsche-tchesire sauce

Why is ketchup married to mustard?

Cause ketchup accidentally broke the condiment.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Whats th first joke you remember hearing or that you told as a kid?

Mine is: What is the white stuff in bird poop? (That is also bird poop.) edit: til you can't edit the topic to fix spelling errors...

How do you estimate your kids lifespan?

Hand them a mechanical pencil with the lead out and see how the use it. Child A: look mom I'm a doctor! - expect them to live to 80+ years. Child B: look mom I'm a heroin user! - expect them to live to about 27.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why are elephants grey?

So you can tell them apart from blueberries!

How bad is it, Doctor?

Doc: Damn it I told you I'm a mine worker not a doctor. It's my name, idiot

Tomato Jokes More Tomato Jokes

Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head?

The tomato was in a can.

What did one tomato say to the other?

A: Catch up.