Mole Jokes

Why was the mole afraid of his own shadow?

Because he thought it was another mole, due to his poor eyesight.

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How can you tell if someone is a chemistry major?

They have a mole on their body.

Why was Avogadro executed?

He was a mole

What does a mole think, when he digs trough lower Austria?

Make way, children.

What animal has exactly 12 grams of carbon?

A mole

What do eagles and moles have in common?

They both fly, except for the mole...

What do a mole and an eagle have in common?

They both live underground. Except for the eagle.

What do an eagle and a mole have in common?

They both live underground, **except for the eagle.**

What did the mole say when someone told him there were entire above-ground civilizations?

Holy moley, I didn't know that!"

How many moles are in a guacamole?

Avacado's number.

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What kind of doctor never leaves the hospital?

An Oncologist

What's the difference between yogurt and white people?

If left out for 4,000 years, yogurt will develop culture.

Mountain Jokes More Mountain Jokes

What do you call a man who jokes that women always make mountains out of molehills?

An ambulance.

What Nationality was Otzi the Caveman?

He wasn't Italian, because he carried work tools, he wasn't Austrian, since he had some brains, he might have been Swiss, since he was outrun by a glacier, but most probably he was a German, because nobody else ever walks in sandals in the mountains.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What does Johnny Depp say when cutting down trees?

TIMBUUUUUUUURTON

How do you get a black man out of a tree?

Cut the rope.

Avocado Jokes More Avocado Jokes

What do you get when you combine Avogadro's number of avocados?

GuacaMole!

What's black on the outside, green on the inside and can go through walls?

Ghost avocado.

Game Jokes More Game Jokes

What game do Anti-Vaxxer's kids play in the pool?

Marco Polio

What do you get when you cross Game of Thrones with Cartoon Network?

Johnny Braavos

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why are MMA fighters told not to blow their nose when in a fight?

Oops, this was supposed to be for . There's no punch line!

What did music tell the pancakes?

B flat.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why can't Australians play chess?

They keep saying check, mate.

What's the difference between an Irish guy dying in a play, and you getting laid?

One's a tragic Mick...

Eagle Jokes More Eagle Jokes

What do a mole and an eagle have in common?

They both live underground. Except for the eagle.

Why aren't eagles allowed to be sick in america?

Because that would be illeagle