Rattle Jokes

Why did the baby drop its rattle?

It got hit by a truck

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Why didn't you answer me ?

Pupil: I did I shook my head Teacher: You don't expect me to hear it rattling from here do you !

Why did the goal post get angry ?

Because the bar was rattled !

How can you tell if a snake is a baby snake?

It has a rattle.

Why is an old car like a baby playing?

Because it goes with a rattle.

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Agony Jokes More Agony Jokes

What happened when a deadly rattle snake bit a witch ?

He died in agony !

What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony?

A tumblr.

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

What do you call a cow that got hit by a car?

moo-tilated.

What did they say about the blind man who got hit by a bus?

He never saw it coming.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What do you call 3 agnostics sitting at a bar?

I don't know.

What's worse than a Redditor walking into a bar?

The Holocaust.

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Why do the Irish wear kilts?

Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

Did you hear about the cow who jumped over the barbed wire fence?

It was udder destruction.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What sweetie?

Tell who what ! Me: Tell Taco Bell their cheese to lettuce ratio is way off..

Why do people love their smartphones so much?

Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What happens every year when the Time Square Ball drops?

Justin Bieber gets jealous.

What is the best thing about dating a homeless girl?

You can drop her off anywhere.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

Who's there ! Anne ! Anne who ?

Anne apple just fell on my head !

What do you call a bloke with a bus on his head?

Dead.

Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What snakes are good at sums ?

Adders !

What does a sheep, a drum, and a snake all say when falling off of a cliff?

Baa-Dum-Sss