How many Mafia hitmen does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Three. One to screw it in one to watch and one to shoot the witness.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, because they can't climb the ladder.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)

How many old-timey gangsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: We ain't sayin' nuthin'.

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard?

4 or 5.

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb?

Seriously, I gotta figure out how many slaves I need to buy

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

How do you stop a mexican tank?

You shoot the guy pushing it.

What's the difference between spider man and superman?

peter parker can shoot webs. clark kent.

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

What's difference between Abu Dhabi and Dubai?

People in Dubai don't watch The Flintstones But people in Abu Dhabi Do!!

Who is consistently the best pro sports team to watch in Minnesota?

The visitors.

Mafia Jokes More Mafia Jokes

How are the Mafia and the Amish similar?

They both don't like wires

What's the difference between the government and the Mafia?

A: One of them is organized.

Witness Jokes More Witness Jokes

How many Mafia hitmen does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Three. One to screw it in one to watch and one to shoot the witness.

What is your date of birth?

Witness: "July 15th." Lawyer: "What year " Witness: "Every year."