What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What happens when Anthony Weiner tries to shake someones hand?

They think long and hard before they touch weiner.

What is an Actor?

A man who tries to be everything but himself

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What did the duck say to the cashier after buying some red lipstick?

Just put it on my bill

What's it called when you go around looking for stuff to buy that's made in America?

Antiquing.

Cent Jokes More Cent Jokes

What happened to the minter who went crazy?

He stopped making cents.

Why didn't Abraham Lincoln go to jail?

Because he was in-a-cent!

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

What did the server say when the customer requested something they didn't have?

404

Candy Bar Jokes More Candy Bar Jokes

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!

How many NRA members does it take to stop a 6-year-old paraplegic from stealing a candy bar?

Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds.

Non Jokes More Non Jokes

What's the best part of an asynchronous dog?

It's non barking! Hopefully some software people get this one

How many vegans does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. Vegans have the same capability of changing a lightbulb as non-vegans.

Clerk Jokes More Clerk Jokes

How long does it take to fly to Boston?

The clerk said "Just a minute..." "Thank you" the man said and hung up.

What did the clerk say to the customer who tried to buy a candy bar with plastic quarters?

This is non-cents!