What did they say about the guy who woke up and jerked off on his alarm clock every day?

He always came on time.

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did they say about the blind man who got hit by a bus?

He never saw it coming.

Where did the pilgrims land when they came to America?

On their feet!

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How can a man go eight days without sleep?

No problem , He sleeps at night.

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and Pinocchio?

Some day, Pinocchio's going to be a real boy.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How can you tell if your wife left you?

You get laid the same amount of times but the dishes start to pile up. Hey now!

What's the top selling book of all time in Korea?

101 Ways to Wok Your Dog

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call a guy who likes to lose?

Ewan

What did the Machop say to the guy who was giving him a hard time?

You're really bustin' Machops!

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

How do you wake a sleeping Lady Gaga?

You poke poke poker face

What does a widow say when she wakes up?

Mourning

Jerk Jokes More Jerk Jokes

When someone says something was made with "love" what exactly does that mean?

Did they jerk one off into the center of my cupcake

What did they say about the guy who woke up and jerked off on his alarm clock every day?

He always came on time.

Alarm Clock Jokes More Alarm Clock Jokes

What do you call a cat when he first wakes up with the alarm clock?

A: Catsup!

Why is marriage is like an alarm clock?

After the ring, you wake up!