Birthday Party Jokes

What did the time traveler say at the birthday party?

I'd tell you happy birthday, but to me, you've been dead for centuries

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Why do pirates like birthday parties?

Doubloons.

What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ?

What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ? Cake Moss and Naomi Candles

Why was Thor disappointed by his birthday party?

Because it was more Loki than he wanted.

What do chickens serve at birthday parties ?

Coop-cakes !

Why don't Pirates get invited to Birthday parties?

Because they always steal doubloons

Where would you find the emo kid at his birthday party?

Just *hanging* out by himself in the bedroom

How can you tell if an elephant's been to your birthday party?

Look for his footprints in the ice cream.

Why was the monster standing on his head at the birthday party?

He heard they were having upside-down cake!

What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?

Angel food cake of course!

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How do you tell the time in the US?

By looking at a bomb

How does a witch tell time?

With a witchwatch.

Traveler Jokes More Traveler Jokes

Why do all travelers use the road to get to Jordans most popular destination?

Because they're all Petra-flied of using the air!

What does a time traveler do when he's hungry?

He goes back 4 seconds.

Ice Cream Jokes More Ice Cream Jokes

Why did the boy drop his Ice Cream?

A: He was hit by a bus

Where did you learn to make ice cream?

Sunday school.

Bedroom Jokes More Bedroom Jokes

Why can't Saudi woman drive?

There's no road from the kitchen to the bedroom.

What about this one for your bedroom?

ME: Hmmm no that one is also far too small

Upside Cake Jokes More Upside Cake Jokes

Why was the monster standing on his head at the birthday party?

He heard they were having upside-down cake!

What do Australians call upside down cake?

Cake.

X Post Jokes More X Post Jokes

What material does Cayde-6 use to repair his armor after falling feet first into hell?

Nathan Filaments ( ) X-Post from /r/DestinyTheGame

What is your favorite one or two line joke?

X-Post from AskReddit) http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/32df3n/whatisyourfavoriteonetotwolinejoke/ There were some funny jokes in there

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

Why is Arjen Robben not being invited to Alfredo Di Stefanos funeral?

They're scared he'll try to dive in the box.

Why should you always invite more than one Baptist on a fishing trip?

Because if you only invite one, he'll drink all your beer.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if a person works in HR or IT?

Ask them to pronounce the following: **HIRES**

How does a psychic cokehead tell the future?

With a magic 8-ball