Divide Jokes

What divides the humans from the monkeys?

The Mediterranean Sea

This joke may have profanity.

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Couple's Daily Question Mug
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How does a blonde count a thousand sheep?

She counts the legs, and divides by 4.

How do a neckbeard's cells divide?

by m'tosis

Why did the amoeba flunk the math test?

Because it multiplied by dividing.

What do black people and dividing by zero have in common?

They don't work.

Why did I divide sin by tan?

just cos.

How do sheep divide candy?

They all get their fair shear

How do I find answers using Google.com?

on Yahoo Answers. Stand by while the internet divides itself by zero.

Why was 7 arrested for homicide?

Because somebody divided 14 into 2 and he was the prime suspect

Why can't white Tumb1r girls divide or multiply by two?

Because they can't even

Why can a number divided by zero never be found in the dictionary?

Because it's undefined.

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How do you teach a girl math?

Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, give her a square root and watch her multiply.

What did the number do when it divided from its companion?

Changed its status from 'In A Relationship' to 'Single'.

How do you divide old Rome?

Using a pair of Caesars.

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Sheep Jokes More Sheep Jokes

How do you milk a sheep?

With iPhone periph**e**rals.

How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

What question must always be answered "Yes"?

What does Y-E-S spell "

What does the caller ID say?

Mom: It's a private caller. Dad: Don't answer that. We only pick up for ranks Lieutenant Caller and higher.

White Jokes More White Jokes

How many blacks does it take to change a light bulb?

5/3. The same amount as for whites.

What's the one public place that most people still support the separation of Colors and Whites?

The laundromat.

Multiply Jokes More Multiply Jokes

How do you teach a girl math?

Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, give her a square root and watch her multiply.

Why did the integer stop multiplying with other integers of equal value?

He was Squared Straight.

Mediterranean Sea Jokes More Mediterranean Sea Jokes

Whats blue and pretty on top, and brown and kind of a bummer in the bottom?

The Mediterranean Sea.

What is it that separates humans from animals?

The Mediterranean Sea

7 Jokes More 7 Jokes

Why can't I have coffee?

Me: It'll make u even more energetic than u already are 7: But u drink it all the time& u never have energy!

Why don't jokes in base 8 work?

Because 7 10 11

Black People Jokes More Black People Jokes

Why do white people think they can say the N word?

Because it is the only thing left that still belongs to black people.

Why are school shooters more likely to be white people?

White people actually go to school. Black people stay home and shoot people in their own neighborhood.

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

What are the 2 numbers?

Her: 44&66 HARDER!

What's a sheep's favourite band?

Ewe 2