Hump Jokes

What do you call a camel with three humps?

Pregnant

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What has four legs, two humps, and is given a copy of Metal Gear Solid for their computer?

Revolver Camelot!

How is a lesbian like a camel?

Their hump has no bone.

Why couldn't the baby camel surf the Internet?

Because whenever his parents saw their phone bill they got the hump.

How did Camelot get its name?

Guinevere liked to hump a lot.

What is the first nursery rhyme blondes learn in primary school?

A. Hump me dump me!!

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Why are E.T.'s eyes so big?

He saw the phone bill.

Why are ET's eyes so big?

He got the phone bill

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What do you get when you cross a leopard and a camel?

A fireside rug you can get a good hump on.

What was Confucius' favorite comfort food?

Macaroni and Qi.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur with vertigo?

Falloffalottapuss

What did the lesbian rattlesnake say to Hillary after they finished making love?

You know, they're right . . . we do taste like chicken!"

Parent Jokes More Parent Jokes

Whos there?

Yoda lady. Yoda lady who Good job yodeling! 2.Knock knock. Whos there Well, not your parents, because your parents never knock!

Why did Darwin love CSS?

Because children inherit properties from their parents.

Wednesday Jokes More Wednesday Jokes

How Do Priests Get High?

Snorting the left over ashes from Ash Wednesday...

Why wasn't the coup in Turkey on Wednesday?

Erdogan's suit wasn't back from the cleaners.

Humphrey Jokes More Humphrey Jokes

What do you call a camel without humps?

Humphrey.

What do you call a camel with 3 humps?

Humphrey. (I was told this joke by an actual dad, it was his response to one of my jokes)

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What's the difference between a blue 7 and a red 4?

3, duh. (My ex's 9 year old little sister told me this joke, and followed is up with: "and YOU'RE the math guy!" >< Burned.)

Why don't people tell jokes about the Reverend Jim Jones?

The punchline is too long.

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

What's half of 8?

5. The other half is 3.

What is amnesia?

Is it: A) memory loss A) memory loss Or 3) The Battle of Hastings