Why did Jesus get a ticket?

He tried to skip the Cross walk.

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How about this one?

Psychic: That shirt is too small. Employee: You didn't even try it on. Psychic: I'm a medium.

Why did the old man hate using the new chip cards?

He's trying to watch his sodium intake.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get if you cross a frog with a decathlete?

Someone who pole-vaults without a pole.

What do you get when you cross Tom Cruise with nails?

A cruiseifixion.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What's the difference between Jesus and Mexicans?

Jesus doesn't have any tattoos of Mexicans.

What is the difference between Jesus and a painting?

You only need a nail to hang a painting.

Skip Jokes More Skip Jokes

Why did Microsoft skip windows 9?

Because 7 ate 9

Why does BuzzFeed skip every other number when counting?

They literally can't even.

Cross Walk Jokes More Cross Walk Jokes

Why did Jesus get a ticket?

He tried to skip the Cross walk.

How did Jesus get to the other side of the street?

He used the Cross Walk.

Ticket Jokes More Ticket Jokes

How many IT people does it take to change a light bulb?

Do you have a ticket for that?

How do you get rid of somebody?

Give them a ticket for a flight on Malaysian Airlines and hope that they will live up to their reputation!