Dead Person Jokes

What do you call a dead person?

Dinner

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What's the best way to pack a dead person in a cardboard box?

Body centered cubic

What's the difference between a viola and a coffin?

With a coffin, the dead person is on the inside.

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Neck Romancer Jokes More Neck Romancer Jokes

What do you call an evil wizard who gives good hickeys?

A neck romancer.

What do you call a person that raises the dead and also had a thing for napes?

A neck-romancer

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What did Ghost A say to Ghost B?

Nothing because ghosts don't exist. Edit:Holy crap I just realized I didn't post this on /r/antijokes.

What's worse than fighting an uphill battle?

Getting to the top and realizing it's all downhill from there.

Laugh Jokes More Laugh Jokes

What to do when the black guy in front of you gets shot?

Stop laughing and reload.

What did the orphan say when the orphanage burned down?

Nothing. He just laughed.

Person Jokes More Person Jokes

Why do you call a person with 3 legs?

Mutated

What's Han Solo's favorite type of video game?

First person shooter.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

Who slept with my wife?

and in the background someone replied "You ain't got enough bullets."

Viola Jokes More Viola Jokes

How do you make a violin sound like a viola?

A: Play in the low register with a lot of wrong notes.

What is the difference between a viola and a trampoline?

A: You take off your shoes before you jump on the trampoline.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What do you call an Irishman who bounces off things?

Rick O'Shea

What's the last thing to go through a fly's mind when it hits a windshield?

It's rear end!

Skin Jokes More Skin Jokes

What is the skin on you forearm called?

Foreskin. Budam tss

What do you call a cat that has boils on its skin and can't feel it's toes?

A leperd