Center Jokes

Why don't call centers hire alligators?

They can't croco-dial the phones.

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Why do donuts have holes in the center?

Because the inventor of the donut wanted to give us a whole experience.

Why were people in the Medieval times so self absorbed?

Because they thought that they were the center of the universe.

What if they had a call center where they call you everyday with a mission to make you laugh?

But instead of a call center, they called it a lol center! So much lol, that it will make you fall!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

I don't know. It kept breaking my guitar strings so I gave up.

Who plays center forward for the vampire football team?

The ghoulscorer.

How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

Just one. From Chuck Norris.

What does NASCAR stand for?

Non-athletic-sport-centered-around-rednecks (I heard this forever ago and wanted to share. Sorry if it happens to be a repost.)

How many Poaz does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

None she is the joke

Why did the feminist sign up for football?

She wanted to be the center of attention.

What's the best way to pack a dead person in a cardboard box?

Body centered cubic

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What did off-center say to tilted?

I don't know either he told me to askew!"

What does NASCAR really stand for?

Non Athletic Sport Centered Around Rednecks

When someone says something was made with "love" what exactly does that mean?

Did they jerk one off into the center of my cupcake

What do you call a hump-backed cow that always wants to be the center of attention?

A drama-dairy.

Why do abcdefghijklmopqrstuvwxy &amp z hate hanging out with the letter n?

Because n always has to be the center of attention.

Who's the most self-centered Muppet?

Beaker. All he says is "Me Me Me."

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Organization Jokes More Organization Jokes

What kind of organization is Atheism?

Non-prophet.

What do you call the headquarters of an organization of space terrorists?

ISISISS

Osama Bin Laden Jokes More Osama Bin Laden Jokes

What do Fred Flintstone and Osama Bin Laden have in common?

A. They both look out their caves and see rubble.

Why was Osama Bin Laden obsessed with Eminem?

He was an Afghani-Stan.

Cop Jokes More Cop Jokes

Why are the cops in Ferguson Steelers fans?

Bullet train!

What did one cop say to the other cop while investigating a crime scene at a farm?

A rooster!

World Trade Center Jokes More World Trade Center Jokes

What were the last two pizzas delivered to the world trade centers?

Two large planes

Why were the people in the World Trade Center mad on 9/11 ?

Because they ordered pepperoni pizza and all they got was plane.

Lol Jokes More Lol Jokes

What did Muslim sonic say on June 5?

Gotta go fasting! LOL

What do you call Professor X doing a wheelie?

Professor + I'm sorry. lol.

Universe Jokes More Universe Jokes

Why is the universe expanding?

It needs more space.

Which place has the strongest gravity in the whole universe?

Bed

Optimist Jokes More Optimist Jokes

What are your strengths?

I'm an optimist and a positive thinker." "Give me an example" "When do I start "

What is the difference between Russian Optimist Pessimist and Realist?

An Optimist learns German. A Pessimist learns Chinese. A Realist learns AK-47.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What's the most frustrating part about being a sheep farmer?

Every time you try to take inventory, you fall asleep.

What are 2 girl chickens that fall in love?

A. Lesbi-hens