Empire Jokes

How do you destroy an empire?

Brexit.

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Where does the Empire buy their robes?

The Darth Mall!

How did the Romans split up their empire?

With a pair of Caesars. (Thanks )

Why does the Empire use Apple?

Because they couldn't find the droid they were looking for

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Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What do you call children born into a whorehouse?

Your kids

What did one druid say to the other?

Bear with me...

Purchase Jokes More Purchase Jokes

Why didn't the vampire purchase the expensive suit?

He just couldn't ever see himself wearing it.

What did the duck say to the cashier after she purchased some lipstick?

Just put it on my bill"

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What do you call a mushroom that goes into a bar and buys everyone a drink?

The fun guy

Why does no one buy food for a platypus?

They always have a big bill!

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

When do you REALLY know you need to break up with you GF?

When she starts winning arguments with you inner-voice.

What do you call it when two bottles of lotion start dating?

A re-lotion-ship.

Darth Mall Jokes More Darth Mall Jokes

Where do Siths do their shopping?

At the Darth Mall

Where do the Sith go shopping?

The Darth Mall.

57 Jokes More 57 Jokes

What's the difference between the grocery store and a math book?

In a math book I can buy 57 papayas at $1.99 each and no one will care.

Why is Empire Strikes Back the best Star Wars movie?

It's a perfect 5/7.

Negligence Jokes More Negligence Jokes

What's is the difference between ignorance and negligence?

I don't know and I don't care.

What's the difference between negligence and falling off of the empire state building?

Nothing if you're a gorilla.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley?

A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.

What's the difference between Lindsay Lohan and the newspaper?

Lindsay Lohan never reads the newspaper in jail, but the newspaper always reads "Lindsay Lohan in jail"