Free Jokes

Why did the EU start downloading random stuff to it's computer?

It had freed up one GB of space.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a three day drinking binge?

Wait I freed ?!?!?"

How did the turtle with no arms and no legs cross the freeway?

Here's a hint: take the F out of Free and take the F out of Way

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a three-day drinking spree?

I freed the what?"

How did the 3 legged frog get across the 4 lane freeway?

Take the F out of Free, and the F out of way and you'll have your answer.

What color are apples?

BOBO THE GORILLA: (signing) Please free me from this prison ME: (writing) Still struggling with colors

What did Abraham Lincoln say after a two week drunk?

I freed what

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Harry Potter?

Santa would never free an elf.

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Declare Jokes More Declare Jokes

How do Southerners get through customs so quickly?

They do declare!

What is the French verb that means "To declare war"?

Surrendre*

West Africa Jokes More West Africa Jokes

Who declared west africa ebola-free?

Who declared west africa ebola-free.

Why do black people from west Africa never go on cruises?

They're not falling for that again.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can a blind person tell if they're home?

They check the architexture.

What's brown, black and blue and lays at the bottom of a ditch?

A brunette that's told one too many blonde jokes.

Hint Jokes More Hint Jokes

How did the turtle with no arms and no legs cross the freeway?

Here's a hint: take the F out of Free and take the F out of Way

Which Norse God consistently uses VPNs?

Ill give you a hint, he remains very low-key.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What do a Marionette User and Tampon Thief have in common?

They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)

Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?

Because then the children have to play inside.

Beg Jokes More Beg Jokes

What's the difference between snow tires and slaves?

Slaves sing when chains are put on them. PS - im going to church today to beg for forgiveness

What's the difference between a paycheck and a pen*s?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck.

Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken ?

Enough drumsticks to feed an army !

What does the chicken says to the other chicken?

Nothing.

Amazon Jokes More Amazon Jokes

What do mathematicians use to get fast delivery?

Amazon'

Why can't you be successful like your brother?

Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes