Include Jokes

What's the most environmentally friendly subreddit?

Everything there is recycled, including this post.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What is the ideal weight of a lawyer?

About three pounds, including the urn.

Why do batteries feel lonely?

Because they are never included in anything.

When you guys describe me to your families do you use the word tigress?

I'd prefer if you included tigress

What's your favorite Andrew "Dice" Clay Joke?

Including dirty nursery rhymes.

What state do most people live in?

Denial. Myself included.

What do dads never forget to include in their "dad" jokes?

PUNctuation Okay, I'll leave.

What is the ideal weight for a lawyer?

About 3 pounds, including the urn.

Why is the set including the square root of 5 and the square root of 4 similar to the set including anarchism and authoritarianism?

They are both unlike radicals.

What do you call a joke that includes a pun about weed?

OC High humor

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Radical Jokes More Radical Jokes

What do you call it when you lobotomize a bunch of terrorists?

Simplifiying Radicals. (MATH joke)

Why is the set including the square root of 5 and the square root of 4 similar to the set including anarchism and authoritarianism?

They are both unlike radicals.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why would you be scared to get Ebola?

You haven't left your couch since 2011.

What is wrong with a humorless person?

A broken funny bone. I'll leave now.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why do people keep a picture of their wife and kids in their wallet?

To remind them why there's no money in it

What if we gave people enough for three fries?

guy who invented ketchup packets

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

Why is Santa always so jolly?

Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. You've probably heard this one before. But it's Christmas tomorrow so what the hell.

What's the only positive from living in the ghetto?

Pregnancy tests

Prefer Jokes More Prefer Jokes

Why do Canadians prefer their jokes in hexidecimal?

Because 7 8 9 A

What's an owl's favorite rock band?

Owls personally prefer the track list of Rock Band 2. Just a solid game.

Dad Joke Jokes More Dad Joke Jokes

Why do they call "roach-clips", "roach-clips"?

because potholder was already taken. I know it's like a venn diagram of drug jokes and dad jokes.

What is a dad joke?

Punchlines that got married and settled down.

Urn Jokes More Urn Jokes

Why didn't the potter get a job?

He didn't *urn* his degree.

What is the ideal weight for a lawyer?

About 3 pounds, including the urn.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow?

A: Down in the mouth!

How long have you felt like this?

Ever since I was a puppy!