Miner Jokes

Why are miners always narcissistic?

Because they MINE as a job.

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Why did the miner feel so low?

He was in a deep depression.

Why couldn't the coal worker get into the movie?

He was a miner.

Whats the difference between a coal mining company and the Catholic Church?

A coal mining company puts miners in shafts not the other way around.......

What did the miner say when he struck gold?

Au, yeah!

Why did the bar owner by a diamond mine get arrested?

He attributed to the delinquency of a miner.

What's the difference between a mining company and priests?

A mining company puts miners in shafts.

Why did the cave hate miners?

They're always picking on him.

What's the difference between a coal mining company and catholic priests?

A coal mining company puts miners in shafts.

When is a parent like a child?

When he's a miner.

What's the difference between a Chilean mining company and a Catholic priest?

One gets their miners stuck in a shaft, and the other gets his shaft stuck in a minor.

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Why were the Seven Dwarfs kicked out of the bar?

Because they were Miners... XD

What's the difference between a priest and a chilean mining company?

One gets its miners stuck in shafts, and the other gets its shaft stuck in minors.

What do you call a young gold digger?

A miner

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What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A flat miner

What do you see when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?

A flat miner. EDIT: spelling

Diet Jokes More Diet Jokes

Why are all early birds Catholics?

Protestant birds don't really want a Diet of Worms.

What did the ascetic say when he broke his fast?

OC I think I'll go on a diet!

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What do you get when you have Tiger Woods, Stephen Hawking, and Dwayne Johnson in the same room?

An Animal, a Vegetable, and a Mineral.

Why doesn't Dwayne Johnson's downstairs neighbor understand references to current events?

He's been living under The Rock.

Diamond Jokes More Diamond Jokes

What happens when almonds die?

Diamond

Why did the archaeologist ask a diamond out to dinner?

Because of his enthusiasm for Carbon-Dating.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

What do you want to work on today?

Well we did neck day yesterday, and the day before. "So...neck day again" You bet

Why sugars are very unhappy these days?

It is sweet but still is not getting added do any thing!

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How do you think the whole Deflategate situation feels to Tom Brady now?

Probably doesn't feel how he prefers it to...

When should you feel sorry for a skunk?

When its spray pump is out of order!

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How can you tell if you're on a Starcraft diet?

Not enough minerals.

What is Blizzard going to call StarCraft 5?

SCV.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

Whats the difference between a hippy chick and a washing machine?

When you drop a load in, it doesn't follow you around for 6 months trying to get spun. 8)

How'd you get that cut above your eye?

Me: *Remembering dropping my phone on my face* "STOP ASKING ME ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!"