Nice Guy Jokes

Who's the nicest guy at the hospital?

The ultrasound guy

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What do you call a nice guy with hemorrhoids?

A stand up guy

Why do nice guys make good lovers?

They always finish last.

What do you call the nicest guy in the hospital?

The Ultra-sound guy..... Who covers him when he's not available The hip replacement guy!

How to be Like Jesus 1. Be a carpenter. 2. Be a nice guy. 3. ?

4. Prophet.

Why do girls like nice guys?

Cause nice guys always finish last.

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Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What do Psychologists say to each other when they meet?

You're fine how am I "

How bad is my career?

I met a homeless guy on the beach in Los Angeles & thought "Wow this guy has it made"

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What happened to Jesus when he tried to play defense on a professional Basketball player?

He got crossed.

What did Jesus say to Melchior?

Thanks for the gold, kind stranger!

Homeless Guy Jokes More Homeless Guy Jokes

Why can't rappers rap about nice things?

YEAH GIRL I'm GOING TO TAKE OFF ALL YOUR CLOTHS AND ....... Give them to a homeless guy because he's cold

What did the vegan give the homeless guy?

A lecture.

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why don't Muslims fight each other often?

Cause they don't want no beef Edit: I'm going to crawl back into my hole now

Why are horse-drawn carriages so unpopular?

Cause horses are rubbish at drawing

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

Who reads the news AND makes coffee?

Katie Keurig. (I know the setup might need some work but I just like the punchline I made up.)

Where does a 19th century Russian imperialist get his coffee?

Tsarbucks.

Beautiful Jokes More Beautiful Jokes

When a guy texts "your beautiful," reply with "my beautiful what?

then laugh and laugh and never talk to that nice idiot again.

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What did Chad Kroeger say after leaving a concert of Justin Bieber?

I want my Nickleback....

Why didn't you stop when I shouted at you back there?

Motorist: I thought you were saying "Good morning Mr. Mayor." Cop: Right. I wanted to warn you about going too fast through the next town.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Why did the skeleton leave the party?

Because everyone was calling him a bone-head. (I was 6 when I came up with that).

What did Ray Charles say when his wife told him she wanted a divorce?

I did not see that coming.