Roast Beef Jokes

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Everyone can roast beef, but no one can pea soup.

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What is the difference between roast beef and pee soup?

You can roast beef.

What' the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef, but not everyone can pea soup. (As told by my 8yo, who made me laugh with a joke for the first time. Proud dad moment.)

What does the ghost like on his roast beef?

grave-y gravy

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What do you call a woman made out of beef?

Patty

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Everyone can roast beef, but no one can pea soup.

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What do you call it when a hedge fund manager loses his job to a Watson inspired AI built by IBM?

It doesn't matter. We'll all be laughing too hard to care.

How do you spell "laughing out loud" by using binary?

1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1o1

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What are your go to jokes?

I was at an event the other day and someone asked "So... anyone know any jokes?" What's everyone's "go to" joke in social situations?

How do you keep an imbecile happy all his life ?

Tell him a joke when he's a baby !

Pea Jokes More Pea Jokes

What do an Iraqi baby, an American president, and a homesick Brit visiting Jerusalem all want?

They all want either pees, peace or peas in the middle east.

How do you make a blonde's brain the size of a pea?

A: Inflate it.

Soup Jokes More Soup Jokes

What do you call soup that you've found a hair in?

Rabbit Soup :D

Why did the chicken end up in the soup ?

Because it ran out of cluck !

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

Whats the difference between a Christian and a Muslim?

One blows up kids, the other gets blown by them.

What's the difference between a horse and a 13 year old boy?

The horse knows when I'm grooming him.

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How do you tell a joke about ISIS?

It's all about the execution

Why can't you tell secrets in a corn field?

Because, corn has ears!

Pee Soup Jokes More Pee Soup Jokes

What is the difference between roast beef and pee soup?

You can roast beef.

What did you have for breakfast?

Pea Soup Q: What did you have for lunch A: Pea Soup Q: What did you have for dinner A: Pea Soup Q: What did you do all night A: Pee soup...