Security Jokes

What do you call the security at a Samsung store?

Guardians of the Galaxy, or firefighters.

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Why do donut shops not hire security?

Because Cops go there willingly. Free security and protection.

Why is it the only thing a woman wants out of a man these days is security?

Well it's the first thing they say when I approach them.

Why didn't the TSA let the chair through security?

It was armed.

What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store?

A: Guardians of the Galaxy.

Who are the real Guardians of the Galaxy?

Security at Samsung.

Why did the door to door sales man get nervous and run away?

He was selling In-Security Heh yeah i dunno i thought it up in a dream and I'm still half asleep bye

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Where can you leave your dog when you shop?

The barking lot.

Why doesn't Elin Nordegren ever shop at the fish market?

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What did Peter rabbit say to his girlfriend when they broke up?

Now you're just some bunny that I used to know."

What did Jesus say to Peter?

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They both lose pounds really fast.

What do you call a man who loses pounds for a living?

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What do you call an essay in a flash drive???

who wants 2 try?

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What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store?

A: Guardians of the Galaxy.

What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops?

Guardians of the galaxy