Suspend Jokes

What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale?

Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Why was Selena Gomez suspended in elementary school?

Because she couldn't keep her hands to herself.

What's the difference between US Politics and WWE?

one is a predetermined charade that takes a tremendous amount of willingness to suspend disbelief the other is pro wrestling.

Why didn't they punish the student who hung himself?

He was already suspended.

Why did Darth Vader get suspended from the Police?

He was under investigation for excessive use of Force

Why didn't Jesus play during the Isreal-Palestine soccer game?

He got suspended.

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Police Jokes More Police Jokes

Why did the police shoot the black insomniac?

He resisted a rest.

What do the Police, the NFL and Black Lives Matter all have in common?

They all have the same PR guy.

Belt Jokes More Belt Jokes

Why, Bro?

B1: Men with no pants... Fighting for a belt... WTF

How can you tell who is a blonde's boyfriend?

A: He's the one with the belt buckle that matches the impression in her forehead.

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

How can you tell the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?

The picture doesn't scream when you hang it.

Why was the leaf hanged?

For tree-son. Ha-ha. Ha.

Arrest Jokes More Arrest Jokes

What do you get if you cross a Buddhist monk and a 16 year old blonde cheerleader?

Arrested for procurement of a minor. Trust me on this one.

Why was the pirate arrested for polygamy?

He kept on and on about his mateys.

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

What's long, straight, and found between a pair of legs?

The hypotenuse.

Why should you bring two pairs of pants when you golf?

In case you get a hole-in-one (stolen from some girl at school)

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead baby?

I don't have a Lamborghini

How do you tell the difference between a chemistry professor and a politician ?

Just ask them to read this word: unionized.

Whale Jokes More Whale Jokes

What is a whales favorite pasttime?

Netflix and krill.

What do you call a group of whales playing music together?

An Orcastra

Wwe Jokes More Wwe Jokes

How does a WWE wrestler like his eggs?

Raw

What's the difference between a WWE wrestler and a soccer player?

A WWE wrestler will get up after faking an injury.