Uber Jokes

What did the sarcastic taximan say when he lost his job?

Oh well that's just uber, isn't it

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Why did the cab driver did not get time for his family?

Because he was Uber busy.

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

What do you call a white guy with 2 black guys in the back of the car?

The police. What do you call a black guy with 2 white guys in the back of the car Uber!

Why can't PC gamers use Uber?

Too many incompatible drivers.

What do laws and virgins have in common?

They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)

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Pc Gamer Jokes More Pc Gamer Jokes

What's the difference between a PC gamer and a console player?

One spends 400 dollars on a console that will play games for years, the other pays 400 dollars for a graphics card that will be outdated in a week

Why can't PC gamers use Uber?

Too many incompatible drivers.

Bro Jokes More Bro Jokes

What did the bro say to the bro who couldn't make it to the party because he didn't have a car?

Do you even Lyft

What did the Kiwi say to the Statue?

Statue bro?

Immigrant Jokes More Immigrant Jokes

What do you do when you're racist and all the immigrants exhaust you?

You kip.

What did the Imam say after he was replaced by immigrants?

They took my hijab!

Boeing Jokes More Boeing Jokes

What do you get when you cross a snake with a plane?

A boeing constrictor

What is the national bird of Afghanistan?

The Boeing 757

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When someone asks "You know what I think?

I say "Yes I do". End of discussion.

What's so funny?

asks the dermatologist. "Sorry, it's a inside joke." replies the surgeon.

Intel Jokes More Intel Jokes

Why didn't Intel call the Pentium the 586?

A: Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605.

What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium's floating point divider?

Life is like a box of chocolates...

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What did the pirate say when his wife kept asking him about the steering wheel in his pants?

Yargg! Woman! Stop asking me! You're driving me nuts!"

Why are Muslims so good at driving at night?

Because that's when they brake fast.

Protest Jokes More Protest Jokes

How many leftists does it take to change a lightbulb?

8,000 to protest against the broken lightbulb but 0 to realize it won't change anything.

What do laws and virgins have in common?

They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)