What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What happens to a legend's career when he loses his leg?

It ends.

What did Jesus do to lose weight?

Crossfit

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why did Helen Keller try lsd?

Because she was told it makes you see things!

How many newsmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Only one but he'll tell everybody.

Control Jokes More Control Jokes

What do you call an unpredictable, out-of-control photographer?

A loose Canon.

How many controlled oposition does it take to change a light bulb?

None you know of. Since they signed a Non Disclosure Agreement to not talk about it.

Bach Jokes More Bach Jokes

Who was the chicken's favorite musician?

Bach.

What do you tell a conductor when they lose control of their orchestra?

Go Bach and get a Handel on it!

Conductor Jokes More Conductor Jokes

What did the rubber say when he was offered a job as the high school choir teacher?

I can't, I'm not a conductor." Pffffffhehewheheheheheh.

What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert?

He was forced to resort to excessive violins.

Handel Jokes More Handel Jokes

What happened when the composer got angry?

He flew off the Handel

Why couldn't Handel play his harpsichord?

Because it was baroquen.

Orchestra Jokes More Orchestra Jokes

How did the unqualified harp player get into the orchestra?

She pulled some strings.

How does Ohm conduct an orchestra?

Standing on his head!