What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What does a dyslectic, agnostic, insomniac think about at night?

Is there really a dog. Dog lover joke.

Which is the best kind of dinosaur to play hide &amp seek with?

An I-Don't-Think- He-Saurus

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why did the cop climb the tree?

He worked for a special branch.

Whats black and isn't working?

Black lives matter.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What did the guy on LSD say while driving on the highway?

Woah, the traffic is moving.

What did the pirate with the steering wheel in his pants say?

Argh it's driving me nuts!"

Mile Jokes More Mile Jokes

Why do Scottish men wear kilts instead of jeans?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

Which word is the longest in the English language?

Smiles - because there is a mile between the first and last letters

Driver Jokes More Driver Jokes

What profession does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Driver

How Am I Driving' sign* *Panics* Hello?

There's a problem. Your driver doesn't understand how he's driving

Accident Jokes More Accident Jokes

Who Got in an Accident?

There was a fork in the road.

What do you call Christopher Reeve before the accident?

Christopher Walken.

Brake Jokes More Brake Jokes

What did the drifter say to the person he hit ?

RIP my E-brake

What did Kurtis Blow tell his son when teaching him how to drive?

THESE are the brakes!

Rush Jokes More Rush Jokes

What do you call an imp that is rushes to the hospital?

Impatient OC from r/dadjokes

How do the Russians invade the Ukraine?

They rush in.

Intersection Jokes More Intersection Jokes

What do you call an intersection where a lot of Asians cross?

A cross-wok.

How does a blond cross the road?

A brunette is on a busy street across from a department store she needs to visit, and is looking for an intersection to cross over when she spots a blonde walking out of the store. The brunette waves and calls out over the traffic noise, "hey there! How do I get to the other side?" The blonde looks confused and calls back, "you ARE on the other side!"