Driver Jokes

Why cant train drivers be sentenced to the electric chair?

Because they're bad conductors.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

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What's worse than being stuck in traffic behind a driver that's vaping?

Realizing that your being intently watched for your reaction to their sic clouds - BEST RECOGNIZE!

What did the driver say to the one-legged hitchhiker?

Hop in.

Why can't truck drivers ever fully retire?

Because they can only semi retire.

What's an empty suit of armor doing on the drivers side of a car?

He went out for the knight. OK I'll leave now

What did the French guy say when he forgot to tell his driver to turn left?

Oh, gosh!

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?

What did the New York Salmon say to the driver?

I'm swimming here!

Why did nVidia built the first self-driving car?

on all conditions) Because their drivers keep crashing.

What are you doing, idiot?

me, to other drivers on the road "What are you doing, idiot " me, to myself, in all other situations

How Am I Driving' sign* Panics Hello?

There's a problem. Your driver doesn't understand how he's driving

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

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Why should you never sit at the top deck of a double decker bus?

Because there is no driver up there.

What profession does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Driver

Why do golfers have the best chauffeurs?

Because they're good at picking their drivers.

What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

What driver doesn't have a license?

A screwdriver

How can you say you don't have any outstanding tickets?

Driver: They're all in the glove compartment.

Why was the driver fired from the destruction derby?

He was accused of wreckless driving.

When I see a "How am I driving?

sticker, I want to take the driver in my arms and tell them that I too have questions about my existence

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Inside Jokes More Inside Jokes

What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside.

What's yellow on the outside and grey on the inside ?

An elephant disguised as a banana !

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why are elevator jokes so funny?

Because they work on so many levels

What do you call a poor photographer who works for a tabloid?

A Pauperazzi

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

How are Americans and poles similar?

Running into one could really ruin your day.

What did the snot say to the nose?

I gotta run.

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

Why did Medusa order pizza?

Her boyfriend was stoned.

Why does a Belgian take a stone and a flashlight to bed?

The stone to throw the lights out, the flashlight to check if the lights are really out

1980 Jokes More 1980 Jokes

Why are all Quaker truck drivers stuck in the 1980's?

Q:Why are all Quaker truck drivers stuck in the 1980's? A: Because they are Haulin' Oats!

What do Margaret Thatcher and Jimmy Saville have in common ?

They both shafted minors in the 1980's.

F1 Driver Jokes More F1 Driver Jokes

What's the difference between cab drivers and F1 drivers?

F1 driver doesn't think he's a cab driver

Why the F1 driver doesn't get along with his crew?

He has thrust issues.

Cab Driver Jokes More Cab Driver Jokes

Why did the cab driver get a divorce?

Because he had a fare.

What did the cab driver say when the black man got into his cab?

Where to sir?

Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

What do you call a late teacher?

Mr. Bus

What do you call a walrus that's been hit by a bus?

Dead.