What kind of tools do I need to make a cake?

Him: The fact that you're calling ingredients tools means u shouldnt be in charge of this.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why are Twilight fans obsessed with it?

Because they need a fandom that won't make them feel like trash.

What does Deadpool need?

Someone to merc him shut up.

Charge Jokes More Charge Jokes

Why did the robot get the electric chair?

Because he was charged with battery.

How did people charge their phones before electricity?

They didn't...!

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

How many homophobes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They don't accept change, even if it means a brighter world.

What do you mean the school must be haunted ?

Daughter: Well the principal kept going on about the school spirit.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of fun does a priest have?

Nun.

What kind of milk does Mitt Romney drink?

1%

Fact Jokes More Fact Jokes

How long is a china-man?

Excuse the question mark, "How Long" is in fact a china man.

How can I draw attention to the fact this skirt is too long?

AHEM!

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

What is a Brit's favorite letter?

You'd think it would be "T", but it is "U". *Favourite, btw.

Why did your car just spin around in circles?

Motorist: I was making a U-turn and changed my mind.

Cake Jokes More Cake Jokes

What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ?

What Super Models should you invite to your birthday party ? Cake Moss and Naomi Candles

How do I like my eggs?

Umm in a cake.

Tool Jokes More Tool Jokes

Why does no one like the swiss army?

Because they are all a bunch of tools.

What tool does a black lumberjack use?

An ask. (Explanation: Because most black people say ax for ask, it is swapped around.) Came up with it by myself, how did I do